The Beginning of My Birth Journey

• July 24, 2016
• Childbirth, Lifestyle, Motherhood, Pregnancy

As any mother would whole-heartedly agree, the birth of your first child is life changing to say the least. In that dizzying, what-just-happened, be still my beating heart kind of way.  You spend all those weeks and months building up what you hope will be a climactic ending to your pregnancy journey. The finish that thrusts you into motherhood with all the guts glitz and glory that you imagined while feeling every little kick and flutter.

During pregnancy we all try to envision bringing our children into the world. Some of us may picture the telltale, water-breaking scene. Yelling “It’s time!” to our husbands as we rush out the door to the hospital where we say “Gimme the drugs right meow” and patiently wait for go time. A handful may imagine delivering our little ones at home with as minimal pomp and circumstance as humanly possible.  And then there are those that fall somewhere in the middle, who choose the hospital setting, skip the drugs, and try to keep things as zen as possible amidst the chaos.

I chose the latter and I want to tell you all about it. Because if you’ve ever delivered a baby, you know that sharing war stories is pretty much your favorite thing to do with other moms. This is especially true when you decide early on in your pregnancy to try for a natural, unmedicated delivery… and then actually succeed! Ladies, I have seen battle. That shit made a woman out of me and I am so proud of it. It was hands down the most challenging, humbling, empowering experience of my life and in all seriousness, I can’t wait to do it again.  I want to share it with you, not only because it is something that I am passionate about, but because I hope to inspire you with a little “YOU CAN DO IT (if you want to)” too!

So hear me out…

I’m going to start by addressing the elephant in the room.  

I think it’s important because I’ve seen this sort of thing get ugly before, and I don’t want any confusion:

Yes, I am an unmedicated childbirth advocate and will absolutely try to inspire and encourage you to consider it as an option for yourself because my experience was a positive one. But that does not mean that I think any less of women who have gone another route whether by choice or not. Motherhood is a level playing field. No one woman is any more or less of a mother who has brought life into this world. ALL BIRTH IS BEAUTIFUL. So let’s not mince words. Deal? Deal.

I digress.  So at a certain point in early pregnancy you are faced with the harrowing task of choosing whether or not you will educate yourself on childbirth.  Then you must take it a step further and figure out the answer to that burning question(s): How the hell am I going to do this? How am I going to come out of this on the other side, with a baby in my arms, a smile on my face, and intact lady parts, like all the pictures? HOW?!

So there you are. Sitting at your computer (or phone. Because your pregnant and too lazy to get up. #letsbehonest). And you type in your very first of many pregnant inquiries to Doctor Google. Yes, Doctor Google. You know him. The one that assures you that the twinge in your lower back is undoubtedly terminal and you’re going to die. That guy. If you don’t know him, wait ’til your baby arrives. You’ll be frenemies by then.

“How to… deliver a baby…”  No no. “Childbirth Instructional..” No. “Childbirth video…” GOD NO.

Methods. The word you’re searching for is methods. And good ol’ Dr. G throws a list 27 pages long of websites and articles about the best way to deliver your unborn child. If you’re anything like me, you casually peruse and the inner dialogue continues: “Ha. HA. No.. Oh, that’s interesting. Um, that’s weird. You can do that? People DO that? WTF is a doula?” This is the place in every pregnancy where I feel as though we all begin to branch off onto our respective childbirth journeys.

It was only a couple years earlier that my dear friend embarked on her own path to an unmedicated labor and delivery. She informed me that her decision was aided by watching a documentary called The Business of Being Born. I love her (shout out to my girl!) and wanted to be along for the ride, so I watched it too. I balked. Good for you, but I’ll pass. Best of luck. I’ll be over here bouncing on a birthing ball in a scene straight out of Baby Mama:

“And how many of you are planning on using toxic western medications to drug your baby for your own selfish comfort, anyone?”

Me: “OH-OHHHHH!”

 But you guys, she did it. She accomplished her goal and I can honestly say that it changed my perception of unmedicated childbirth on a dime. I was inspired and in awe of her strength and resolve, her belief and trust in her body, and her desire to kick the status quo to the curb and do something that pretty much no one we knew was doing. I wrote her a letter. I thought she was super woman and I told her. And that day, I decided I would do the same.

My philosophy on childbirth began to take shape from that point on.  My husband and I decided that The Bradley Method would be our foundation of knowledge and I found that the midwifery practice really resonated with me as it is particularly non-invasive in nature and very supportive of unmedicated birth. I also chose to seek out the assistance of a doula for labor support and advocacy. I slowly built my little birth team from the ground up.  And then I started reading….

Stay tuned for Parts II & III of my birth story coming soon!

XO,